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Hi--

As all of you know, the official title of the tune to the song "Danny Boy" is "Londonderry Air". You have to be VERY careful how you say it, taking care to leave a pause between -derry and air, or something else comes out...

DANNY BOY Words copyright 1993 Anne Prather
Tune: Londonderry Air

Oh Danny boy, your buns, your buns are showing Beneath the kilt that you so proudlym wear Because a lovely Scottish breeze is blowing You have exposed your London Derrierre.

	CHORUS
	So come ye back when you are dressed more properly
	Or when the weather's just a bit more fair
	For though your kilt is rich with tartan finery
	You have exposed your London Derrierre.

And though you think the full moon may be calling You to a state of nudish debonair
We here at church still find it quite appalling That you'd expose your London Derrierre.

        CHORUS So when you dance a hornpipe jig or reel And your legs kick way up in the air
Remember please how all us prudes will feel If you expose your London derrierre.         

        CHORUS This is best performed of course with the schmaltziest, most Victorian, gushy accompaniment you can think of--Imy personal fantasy is to perform it with a full orchestra--but that's another story.

Here's another one that really IS mine, no matter what people think--

CALM DOWN III Words Anne Prather
Music: "Calm Down' Kathy Mar

The Trekkies have invaded, they're everywhere you look And every conversation is another Star Trek book There's Trekkie clubs and Trekkie zines and if you really care There's a million Star Trek buttons you and all your friends can wear

	CHORUS
	Calm down, it's only Leonard Nimoy
	Calm down, it's only Mr. Spock
	Calm down and speak to me of starships
	Please realize that I'm not up to all your bawdy talk

They stand around for hours as I'm sure you've seen and heard And much of what they say and write is really quite absurd Oh Mary Sue upsets me and it's really quite a shock To find Star Fleet's finest Captain Kirk in love with Mr. Spock

        CHORUS The Trekkie faction's growing, the day may be at hand When the show will run eternally by popular demand I'd rather be a renegade and have naught at all to do With these awful fannish tales of KS and Mary Sue

        CHORUS I think I'll watch each episode and when I know them well I'll rearrange each trek zine clear from here to Trekkies' hell Oh it may take a lifetime but when I'm finally through There'll be no awful tales of KS and Mary Sue

	CHORUS
	Calm down, it's only Leonard Nimoy
	Calm down, it's only Mr. Spock
	Calm down and speak to me of starships
	Unless you really want to see me faint away in shock
	It's never been my lifelong dream to sleep with Mr. Spock
	Please realize that I'm not up to all your bawdy talk
	Oh, no!

Yes, occasionally a sense of humor invades. Trouble is, I don't think my brain contains the right growth media for it. I can't keep a humor culture going for anything--at least not when it comes to song parodies.

Have fun,

Anne Received on 02/18/97