A twisted Don McLean song

> > American Pie --- StarWars

> > To the tune of Don McLean's American Pie:

replyDon is no longer with us, but during his life he was both a Fan and writer of filk. Here is one I learned from him at Orycon in 1968. Yes, there were Orycons 30 years ago, and yes I know this year is Orycon 19. Don't ask me ...

In those days, Don was just another guy with a guitar and a twisted sense of humor. This is certainly copyright material, but nobody else I've met has ever heard this one. I don't think Don would mind. The tune is complex, with a lot of changes. I'd be glad to sing it into a tape machine at Westercon if someone wants to collect it.

• Larry

On The Amazon

by Don McLean

There's a danger zone
Not a stranger zone
Than the little plot I walk on, That I call my home

Full an eerie sight
Weird and Scary sight
Every vicious animal, that creeps and crawls and bites

Oooooon the Amazon, the prophylactics prowl On the Amazon, the hypodermics howl
On the Amazon, you'll hear a scarab scowl, and sting Zodiacs on the wing

All the stalagtites, and vicious vertebrae Hunt the stalagmites, while laryngitis play All the parasites, that come from Paraguay In spring

Snarling equinox, among the rocks
Will sieze you
And the fahrenheit comes out at night
To freeze you

While duodenums are lurking in the trees And the jungles swarm with green apostrophes Oh the Amazon is calling me

On the Amazon - the pax vobiscum bite
On the Amazon - the epiglottis fight
On the Amazon - the hemispheres at night all slink

All the hippodromes, that lie concealed in mud Join the metronomes, that sit in slump and sludge Then the kodachromes come out and drink their blood For kinks

While velocipedes, among the weeds,
Will scare you
And the menopause, with hungry jaws
Will snare you

Frenzied animals infest the hills and slopes Everyone avoids the deadly stethoscopes
Oh the Amazon is calling
Yes the Amazon is calling
Oh the Amazon is calling me. Received on 03/16/97